Undesirable No. 1

I have a confession.

I feel like shit.

Not just because I am desperately trying to stave off a cold and am popping paracetamol and vitamin C tablets like there's no tomorrow. No, I feel like shit appearance wise. Namely my face. Yeah my face sucks balls right now. Not literally. Ish.

I think I have had clear skin about twice this year. Each time lasting about a week. Then the dreaded blemishes start appearing. And I have tried everything. I've been on antibiotics, I've bought The Body Shop out of tea tree oil, I've bought La Roche Posay's super-acne-fighting-skin-saving-pixie-dust-making trio of products, I've tried crazy expensive products (sample size obvs, I am a reasonably poor student) and fuck all has worked. Fuck. All.

And it pisses me off. I don't usually wear that much make up but say on a night out, I'll shove a bunch of the stuff on. The lighting in da clubs is not the most flattering to say the least. But foundation and concealer will stick to the spots and make them even more obvious and dried out. And frankly, it just looks disgusting. 

And when you have clear skin, you feel so much more attractive. You don't really think about it when you have spot-less skin as you'll be fixating on something else wrong with you - we all do it. But once that clear skin is a distant memory, you'll wonder why you never woke up every day like, fuck yeah my face is as smooth as a baby's arse. 

Really, I feel like this:

(Any excuse for Harry Potter. Not even sorry).

Because yes, I like to look nice. Not just for myself but for other people. And sometimes, if I'm having a bad day, I appreciate a double take from a person on the street. I feel this is a tricky subject to approach but I'm just going to bosh on. My blog, my rules.

I am 6ft tall. I get looks. Usually from my face to my feet to make sure I'm not wearing heels. And I like these looks (that come from both men and women I hasten to add). Anybody would. But I hate them when I have a horrible blemished face. My self esteem (which is low at the best of times) just plummets. 

And when I do go out of a night with intentions to snare some unwitting male, I don't want to be worrying about my face scaring them off. I'd rather be worried about my dress riding up or falling off my, albeit very low, heels. Does this make sense? I don't think this makes sense.

At work on Sunday, I went without foundation or concealer and just played up my eyes to try and distract from my skin. One of my regular customers asked if there was something wrong with my face and had I been in a fight? It wasn't Tall Australian thankfully. He's a gentleman. 

Basically, what I'm saying is I just spent £50 on all natural skincare in a last ditch attempt to clean up my face. Although I did just come across this blog post from The Beauty Gypsy which I think sounds like a very scientific method and therefore must work and I should most definitely try it. Ahem:

Why sex is good for your skin. And hair. AND it’s all backed by science!

Anyway, I shall keep my spotty chin up and of course keep you updated on the progress of my skin. I know you're all dying to be kept in the loop. And you know you'll be informed if  The Beauty Gypsy's method works. If you have any tips, I would love to hear them. I am slowly going insane every time another blemish appears. Now let's go find me a Lawyer Boy...