Foreshadowed The Fuck Outta That

Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to refer you back to my previous post and more importantly, the ending of said previous post:

'Maybe I'll just try and jump Tall Australian at work on Sunday? Don't knock it till you try...

You never know, he might turn round and be all...'

WELL. Considering it is Sunday today, you can be rest assured that I did not jump him. I haven't even gone to work yet (running late as per usual, ever the professional).

But on Saturday. Oh yes, on Saturday...

I'd just come back from my lunch break - oh! Whilst on said lunch break, I was on the phone to my mother trying to organise the Christmas holibobs when this old dude caught my eye with his wife. I was like, can I help you...? Turns out he was the Indonesian puppet man. And bless him, he was just telling me that they'd got them home safe and were thanking me for the time and effort I put into helping them. It was really sweet actually. Also this is the 4th time I've been recognised out of work on the street. Not on the street like in a prostitute way. I still have my job, I'm not getting that desperate.

Anyway. I'd just come back from my lunch break and was back behind the till when Alice, my co-worker, came up to me all cray cray excited about something. I was like, bitch what? And this is how our conversation went:

Alice: 

Well while you were away for lunch, this South African man came into the shop and was asking for you. He asked your name and I told him you were on your lunch break but could I help him with something. And he said he'd come in because he wanted to ask you out for a drink so could he give me his number to give to you.

Me:

....  You're kidding right. 

Alice:

No! He was tall and -

Me:

KIND OF BLONDE AND RUGGED LOOKING LIKE HE'D PROBABLY BE REALLY GOOD AT ROCK CLIMBING OR SOMETHING

Alice:

Yeah and so I asked if he was Australian... Turns out he's South African and -

Me:

BITCH IF YOU'RE MESSING WITH ME RIGHT NOW I SWEAR - 

And then she handed me a piece of paper with a name and number on it.

So basically...

I GOT ASKED OUT BY TALL AUSTRALIAN WHO IS ACTUALLY SOUTH AFRICAN WHICH IS MY BAD, I KNEW HIS AUSTRALIAN ACCENT WAS A BIT OFF, BUT THAT'S NOT EVEN THE POINT. THE POINT IS THAT THIS IS A THING THAT LEGITIMATELY HAPPENED. FO REALZ THO.

And I texted him that night while I was getting ready to go out to Bombskare with Sophie. I said:

'I must have pretty incredible shop assistant skills to get your number whilst on my lunch break and not even in the shop...'

AND HE SAID(!!!!):

'You obviously do!! I finally worked up the courage to get it to you!! Only took twenty trips buying random shit.'

I MEAN!!!!!!! HOW IS THIS EVEN HAPPENING RIGHT NOW? HOW IS THIS MY LIFE??