Friday, 8 January 2016

Happy New Year And All That

What is UP fuckers? Happy New Year!! Merry Christmas!! Everything has finally slowed down enough for me to have the time to write again. Also I'd completely forgotten I even had a blog until about 3 hours ago.

So where were we, where were we?

I left Paris! I left Paris over a month ago and it's a little bit sad and a little bit weird. I miss it every now and then - I even miss the girls! Actual children! But then again, I have the bestest of lives at the moment.

I'm now living in Southampton with Ryan and it is the tits. Well not Southampton as such because bitches be real; it's not Paris. Living with A BOY is working out rather wonderfully. We have an adorable house with a garden and - get this - we're going to get a cat this month. A REAL LIFE CAT THAT WILL BE OURS AND HOLY SHIT I AM SO EXCITED I MIGHT WEE.

It's so weird and grown up having a house. Especially an unfurnished house so we've had to raid Gumtree for furniture. But I'm pretty pleased at how it's turned out so far.

The before... (and the handyman).

And the after...

We Christmassed the fuck up.

Christmas was actually really rather excellent. Because I had two. I had one very hectic actual Christmas with my family in Lincoln. 12 of us, 4 dogs and a cat in one house was a bit much for me so it was so nice to come home to Southampton with Ryan and have our own quiet Christmas. Ryan cooked and we stayed in our dressing gowns like old ladies practically all day.

I also had very wonky eyebrow game. Sisters not twins right? Very very distant sisters. Like, sisters who never really got on because one turned into a goth when she hit high school and the other was super popular.

Also we legitimately look horrendous in any photo I take of us because Ryan is so enormous (see: my arms stretched all the way out and up) and so it's an awful angle. How dare he.

I have an actual proper grown up job now too. Like, a 35 hour fo realz one. It's still in retail though which is a bit soul destroying but it's back at my old charity and I've been promoted to Assistant Manager so there's that. Ryan works funny hours as a VTS Operator (I have no idea either) so we saw each other for approximately 10 seconds today as he was in the car driving to work and I was walking home from work. 

He gets lots of days off though so we're trying to time them so we're both off and can go and do adorable things together like walks in the woods and Dunelm shopping trips and GO TO RSPCA RE-HOMING CENTRES TO LOOK FOR CATS and all the fun shit. Life's pretty damn good.

But now I'm back in ye olde Englande (and living here for the first time since I was about two) it is becoming clear to me that I am very friendless. I would even go as far to say ALL the friendless. Everyone I know is back in Scotland and I miss having friends. I mean, Ryan's all fun and games and has an excellent bottom but sometimes you need to have friend catch ups over wine with friends and wine...

So here is me putting out a friend lonely hearts advert. I'm fun to drink alcohol with and occasionally drink coffee before alcohol with and even better drink coffee and alcohol combined with. Someone please befriend me. I'm all the fun. And soon I'll have a cat. What more could anyone want?!!

So how was your Christmas? And New Year? And will anybody be my friend and/or give me a cat?

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