Thursday, 5 February 2015

Teddy Bear Bartenders

Sophie and I went out last night to Blues Jam. It's a really chill night at our friend's bar (that's right fuckers, I know someone who owns a bar) and it's always good to go for a few drinks and eventual drunken dancing. There also happens to be a really cute bartender there. Did I fool you? Did you think for just one second that this post might not be about men? Have you learned nothing?

The cute bartender also happens to own the bar. You know, they co-own it. And good lord, he is so my type. I mean, he's tall (6'3"), he's slightly bearded (usually I just go for stubble but now it's Winter, I feel like beards look more cosy. Just me?) and is all cuddly looking and teddy bear-like. I've always thought he was cute and Sophie apparently knew this. That, or she just knows me too well.

Basically, Sophie and Gav (the non bartender who owns the bar) were playing matchmaker. Gav had very casually said to me that Teddy Bear Bartender had been single for a few months and that we would get on well together. He then gave me 10 seconds to go over and talk to him or Gav himself would pull out a How I Met Your Mother; 'haaaaave you met Nancy?'

I protested greatly that I wouldn't know what to say or do - when I get nervous or excited, I don't know what to do with my hands and so end up swinging them about screaming 'I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MY HANDS'. God, I'm a catch.

But Gav had reached the end of his 10 second countdown so he dragged me over to the bar and got Teddy Bear Bartender's attention. With a quick 'haaaave you met Nancy?' he then ran off chuckling to himself. And then I was LEFT all ALONE with Teddy Bear Bartender and I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MY HANDS. But we kinda started talking (well, shouting over the blues music in the background) and it was all fine. When I left to go home, I gave him a piece of paper with my number on it - I've never done that before, it was all very exciting.

And I got a text from him this afternoon. Which was also all very exciting. And we've been texting a bit but I just have no idea what to say to him... I don't think 'I think you're really kinda hot and I would really love to sleep with you in all your teddy bear-ness and beardyness pleasethankyouverymuchso' is really acceptable.

Ho hum, we'll see. Although, as my mother reminded me on the phone this morning, I am not going to 'lose' SD. I need to hang on to him (her words). Which I do, he's nice and makes me feel happy. And he really does look all manly and rugged in his recent snapchats. But, I mean, I've not made myself exclusive to him. He's offshore right now. What else am I supposed to do...

I don't foresee great things with TBB (yaaaasss more abbreviated codenames) but I'd be quite disappointed if I didn't sleep with him. I mean, seriously. I think he's bloody gorgeous. In a cuddly beardy way. Which is the best way.

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